Dear Drivers: We Need to Talk

October 1, 2026

A Mom’s Completely Reasonable Guide to Not Being a Jerk on the Road

I have questions.

So many questions.

Mostly about driving.

Because somewhere between learning that red means stop and getting our driver’s licenses, apparently a large portion of society collectively decided:

“You know what? Rules are more like suggestions.”

And listen, I’m not claiming to be the world’s most patient driver.

I have places to be. Kids to transport. Errands to run. A coffee getting progressively colder in the cup holder. And at least once a week, I’m probably questioning why I left my house in the first place.

But there are some basic driving courtesies that I thought we, as a society, had agreed upon.

Apparently not.

So, since nobody else is calling a meeting…

Welcome to the meeting.

👋 First of All: WHERE DID THE THANK-YOU WAVE GO?

You need to merge.

Traffic is backed up.

I could very easily stare straight ahead and pretend I don’t see you.

But I don’t.

I slow down.

I create a space.

I LET YOU IN.

And then…

Nothing.

No wave.

No little hand in the rearview mirror.

Not even the tiny two-finger steering-wheel salute.

NOTHING.

Excuse me?!

I just performed an act of kindness in traffic.

I don’t need flowers. I don’t need a handwritten card. I don’t even need eye contact.

I need approximately 0.7 seconds of hand movement.

👋

That’s it.

The thank-you wave costs nothing.

BRING IT BACK.

🚨 Your Blinker Is Your Friend

Your turn signal is literally installed in your vehicle for the sole purpose of telling the rest of us what you are planning to do.

Please use it.

And preferably use it before you start moving into my lane.

Because your blinker is a request, not a warning.

There is a difference between:

“Hey, I’d like to come over. Can you make room?”

and

“SURPRISE! I’M COMING OVER NOW. GOOD LUCK EVERYBODY.”

Flipping your blinker on halfway through changing lanes does not count.

At that point you're just narrating something that already happened.

🛣️ The Side of the Road Is Not the Secret VIP Lane

Traffic sucks.

We all agree.

Nobody enjoys sitting there.

But you know what the shoulder is NOT?

An additional lane that only you were clever enough to discover.

You did not unlock a bonus level.

You are not Mario finding a shortcut.

The rest of us did not sit in traffic because we simply failed to notice the giant empty strip of pavement beside us.

That's the shoulder.

It's there for emergencies.

It is not there so you can fly past 47 cars and then attempt to shove your way back in at the front.

And now I’m supposed to let you in?

Friend.

We need to discuss your choices.

🏍️ Also, Can We Stop Trying to Murder Motorcyclists?

Look.

Do motorcycles occasionally irritate me?

Absolutely.

When traffic is crawling and one comes cruising up the middle, is there sometimes a tiny part of my brain that goes:

“Oh COME ON.”

Yes.

I am human.

But you know what I don't do?

TRY TO HIT THEM.

I've watched people intentionally move their cars toward motorcycles to block them.

Why?!

You are sitting inside several thousand pounds of metal.

They are sitting on a motorcycle.

This is not an equal fight.

And if it's raining?

Come on.

They're already getting pelted with water, visibility is worse, the road is slick, and they're trying to safely get wherever they're going.

You don't have to love motorcycles.

You don't have to understand every decision a rider makes.

You just have to remember:

There is a human being on that bike.

Someone's husband.

Someone's wife.

Someone's kid.

Someone's parent.

Being annoyed does not give us permission to put somebody's life at risk.

Give them space.

Let them get home.

🚗🚙 AND NOW, A LESSON ON MERGING

Apparently we need to revisit this one.

Two lanes.

One lane ahead.

What happens?

One car from the left.

One car from the right.

Left.

Right.

Left.

Right.

Look at us!

✨ WE MADE A ZIPPER. ✨

This should not be difficult.

But inevitably there is someone six inches from the bumper in front of them thinking:

“NO ONE SHALL PASS.”

Sir.

This is not Game of Thrones.

You are not defending the wall.

Let the car merge.

Then you go.

Then the next car merges.

And somehow — through the miracle of basic cooperation — EVERYONE KEEPS MOVING.

😡 Why Are We All So Angry?!

This might actually be the biggest one.

Why does everything on the road have to become a personal attack?

Someone needs to merge?

HOW DARE THEY.

Someone accidentally got in the wrong lane?

ABSOLUTELY NOT.

Someone isn't accelerating quite as quickly as you'd like when the light turns green?

HONK IMMEDIATELY.

Someone left more than seven inches between themselves and the car in front of them?

UNACCEPTABLE. MUST FILL GAP.

Guys.

Chill.

We're all just trying to get somewhere.

Work.

School.

Home.

Target.

Soccer practice.

The grocery store.

Possibly Starbucks because dealing with all of you has become exhausting.

You're probably going to arrive within approximately the same three-minute window whether you drive like a normal human or audition for Fast & Furious 37: Tampa Traffic.

❤️ The Road Would Be So Much Better If We Just Remembered There Are PEOPLE in the Other Cars

That's really what it comes down to.

The car trying to merge isn't just a car.

There's a person inside.

The motorcycle isn't just a motorcycle.

There's a person on it.

The person driving a little slower might be elderly.

The person who hesitated at the intersection might be lost.

The parent in the SUV might have two kids arguing in the backseat while Google Maps screams “RECALCULATING” and somebody announces they need to pee despite being asked FOUR TIMES before leaving the house.

We don't know.

So maybe we could all give each other just a tiny bit more grace.

Use your blinker.

Let somebody merge.

Wave when somebody lets you in.

Don't use the shoulder as your personal express lane.

Give motorcycles room.

Learn how a zipper merge works.

And for the love of everything holy…

STOP SPEEDING UP WHEN SOMEONE TURNS THEIR BLINKER ON.

We are all going somewhere.

We all want to get there.